in neonburn, programming, startup

managing your enthusiasm

If there is one thing that is likely to unsteady the ship as a sole founder is lack of enthusiasm. No one there to push you on. No one to confide in. No one to help when things are just not working. All these things can lead you down the dark path.


I was reminded just how bad this can get over the last week or so when I got myself into a rut while trying to solve a problem with my code.

To be specific:  I use fabric.js to draw shapes on an HTML5 canvas, however, I have pretty much wrote my own way to scale objects up and down as I found that if you have an image as a shape background then you get unacceptable pixelization – I tried the static and dynamic resize filters but they appear too slow. All was working fine but things were going wrong when you have a group shape as resizing wasn’t working correctly – amongst other things.

What I thought should have been an easy task turned into a nightmare. I was hacking away – essentially like a headless horseman – grasping at any straw to solve my problem without ever really thinking about the problem. The real problem was just that I wanted to solve the big problem without really knowing what all the little problems were. You see this so much these days with code, folk expect to find the solution to their problem on StackOverflow, and if they do, they copy-paste in the solution without ever understanding the problem. The day always comes where you can’t do this or it doesn’t really solve your problem and you only realise too late. That’s another story for another day though!

So the more days that went past the more I got frustrated by this problem. As each day ticked by my daily schedule (as I talked about before) was just a worthless piece of paper that I filled out each morning trying to pretend that I was in control. Each day my enthusiasm was dropping exponentially. This is where is really hit home having no one to talk over the problem with – talking it over with friends is likely not much use as no one is likely to understand what you are doing deeply enough to make any technical contribution. I was honestly at the point where I thought it was easier to just abandon Neonburn before I’d ever given it a chance. It’s amazing how the mind works, you’re happy to give up something you’ve given months and months of your life over to just because of one little problem.

Thankfully I started making small wins by edging little by little to a working solution, at which point the enthusiasm gradually startsed increasing. I started to understand the problem (I abstracted it mathematically rather than trying to write code to solve my problem). All of a sudden things were looking better and it’s amazing how good it feels getting these little wins. It’s important to accept that just because you can describe the problem succinctly it means that the said thing is easy to accomplish technically – think hoverboard!

So I’m not entirely sure of the moral of this story is. It’s probably along the lines of give yourself little wins all the time which of course means you need to set yourself smaller tasks. Walking away from something is actually the easy option, but then again so is battling away without really thinking about what you are fighting. However, I in no way believe that this won’t happen to me again. The only thing I remember thinking at the time that got me back on track was: this has happened before, and you always get it fixed even if it seems impossible at the time (this is assuming that you know it’s at least possible). I don’t want to trout out the whole “never give up” mantra as that sounds too much self-improvement-guy, it’s more a “never give up without having a proper logical converstation with yourself about it” – that’s not as snappy though!

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